I think Relationships or Partnerships are important to a human’s overall health. We, by nature, are social beings. We need companionship, even if it is not in a romantic way. Humans need someone, or maybe even something to talk to, even if no response can be given. Feeling cared about offers comfort on our worst days, and caring about someone or something can bring motivation to do things maybe we wouldn’t, couldn’t or simply don’t want to do. There is also the aspect of two heads being better than one. Having help to pay bills, discuss an important life matter, succeed on the job, or offer sufficient help to others is always much easier when you are not alone in the endeavor.
I feel like majority of my positive relationships are within my family. My sister is literally my best friend and I couldn’t be more happy to say so. I am also very close with my cousins, who are a set of twins. With regards to all three of these relationships, I feel like they are positive because they are open, honest, unrestricted and unjudging. The energy between us separately, and when we are all together is always so good and freeing almost. We understand each other and we understand the concept of being a good sister. I identify with one twin more than the other and it is the same with my sister and the other twin, so that is an added benefit because no matter what, within this group, there is someone to understand exactly where you are coming from emotionally.
Me and my sister didn’t always have the best relationship. Until I was basically out of high school we could be described as having the worst case of sibling rivalry. Then something I never thought would happen, happened. She moved out of the house. This was the point I began to realize how much she really did mean to me and much I valued her and wanted, more like needed, a good relationship with her. Little by little we grew closer and closer and overtime we formed a bond that nothing or no one could break. Me and my cousins, although literally blood cousins, never spent any real time together until we were in our 20s. It may sound weird but my grandmother has 10 brothers and sisters and each of them have large families and so we knew each other, but not too personally. Then it just so happened I connected with one twin, Elizabeth, through a mutual friend of ours and our bond was like instant. Then Evan, her sister, moved back home from college and all three of us grew closer and closer, and naturally, my sister did the same; and now we might as well be a set of quadruplets!! We maintain our relationships by always being there for each other not only with physical favors, but mentally and emotionally. We help each other make big decisions, avoid the wrong people, and motivate each other to do better in every aspect of life. I couldn’t be more blessed to have family as my best friends.
It’s very easy to find common interest and get along with new people on the surface. I think the work comes in when it’s time to get to the root of who you are deep inside. Different situations bring out the true you and in order to stay close with somebody you have to be willing to expose that part of yourself, and they have to be willing to accept it, or to help you improve it. The relationship or partnership has to include give and take. It’s not about how a person can benefit from you or you from them. It has to be mutual otherwise it quickly becomes an unhealthy situation. Sharing a common goal can also make getting closer with someone you don’t necessarily care for or wouldn’t normally spend time with much easier.
I think all of my experience has taught me more than anything that in order to truly form a real relationship or partnership with someone, you have to humble yourself and allow yourself to be vulnerable in the situation. Being aggressive in any form or fashion will cause the other party to do the same and instant walls are built and sometimes can’t be taken down. I feel that this knowledge as well as my ability to follow through with it helps me in my career every time I come in contact with a new parent or family. And because I have struggled with close relationships, and have seen how it can be turned around for the better, I am more than willing to humble myself in order to learn about people from a genuine place. That genuine care makes all the difference as a Early Childhood professional.